The man I have become

By Shyam Kamal

Two words diverged in a wood and I –
I took the road most travelled by ,
And that has made all the difference
as I sit here, rambling with abhorrence.

One road led to a place I sought
A place where I can be happy, I thought.
But like all the good things made by fate,
This one too, came with a checkmate.

Choosing this path had its own danger –
I would have to be alone – be a stranger.
Succumbing to the fear of failure and rejection,
I naively chose the path to my self-destruction .

I do not blame the path as the cause of my despair!
It was just another case of the hole being round and the peg being square!
And here I am speaking from an abyss
With absolutely no hope left of finding any bliss.

I have grown sick of blaming someone else for my fall
“It has always been my mistake, my stupid mistake”, I bawl.
And with this confession of my honest yet fatal error
I wish to put an end to all this unleashed terror.

I am tired of feigning smiles and faking joy.
For when the soul is dead, nothing more is left to destroy.
Because even after all this time, the man I could have become
Still continues to haunt the man I have become.


By Shyam Kamal

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